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You know, I don't know whether or not to decide if the 'main character' is the killer or tried to help the woman. Or maybe he's responsible for her death and had metaphorical blood on his hands! What if he's blaming himself for her death? You know what; how 'bout you decide?

I've decided for this to be about a person whom blames himself/herself for their lover's death. Anyways, hope you enjoy! :)

Poem (C) C.J.Smith/ 2013

:icondonotuseplz::iconmyartplz: © All rights reserved. Please do not claim, reproduce, copy, edit, publish, upload or use in any way.
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:icon0rvel:
0rvel Featured By Owner Oct 13, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist

stained red.

 

So I take out a knife

and end my own life

as the roses and violets do

we all die too.

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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Nov 17, 2013  Student Writer
Now I wish I'd thought of that... :ashamed:
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:icon0rvel:
0rvel Featured By Owner Nov 17, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist

=D

I couldn't of thought of it if you hadn't made the first 2 Paragraphs!

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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Nov 17, 2013  Student Writer
:huggle:
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:icon0rvel:
0rvel Featured By Owner Nov 17, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist

Poems for the win!

 

HUGZ! Huggle! 

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:iconourfallenangel:
OurFallenAngel Featured By Owner Sep 21, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Oh my.. *gasp*
Beautiful twist at the end. I love the last verse.
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Sep 21, 2013  Student Writer
Thank you! :hug: I really appreciate you liking it :)
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:iconmaybe-paper-hearts:
maybe-paper-hearts Featured By Owner Sep 21, 2013  Student Photographer
wow! it's totally amazing! 
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Sep 21, 2013  Student Writer
Thank you! :)
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:iconjanipanani:
JaniPanani Featured By Owner Sep 21, 2013  Hobbyist
What a plot twist in the end! I was waiting for one of those sugary love stories but this one was melancholy enough for even me to enjoy!
The ending's definitely what makes the poem have such an impact; so many ways to look at it.
I also like how you're analyzing it in the description; someone went way deeper than they first intended huh! :D
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Sep 21, 2013  Student Writer
Hehe, thanks! I appreciate the comment, and thank you as well for the insight! :hug:
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:icongremilnsinthecrypt:
gremilnsinthecrypt Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2013  Student General Artist
O.O ....... AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Jul 21, 2013  Student Writer
Thanks :)
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:iconwhisperingfoot:
Whisperingfoot Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
This is awesome, it reminds me of the movie "Fugitive"
He tried to save his wife and she died with her blood on his hands and he is framed for her murder...
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Jul 1, 2013  Student Writer
Hmm... I guess I'm going to have to see that now! :D But thanks for your appreciation :)
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:iconwhisperingfoot:
Whisperingfoot Featured By Owner Jul 1, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
No problem! And it's a good movie ;)
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:iconzeroskyler:
ZeroSkyler Featured By Owner Jun 26, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
So when I first started reading this i thought that it wasn't worth the time, and without a doubt it wouldn't have been were it not for the second stanza. That addon was very well done, and I applaud you
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Jun 26, 2013  Student Writer
Thank you so much! I know I've said this many a-times before, but your words mean a lot to me! :tighthug: Thank you!
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:iconj-skipper:
J-Skipper Featured By Owner May 8, 2013  Professional Digital Artist
Well that's depressing!
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Jul 21, 2013  Student Writer
:)
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:iconmalonepony:
malonepony Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
for the second stanza, mebe this would work:
But the roses are wilting
The violets; they're dead
Your bodies so still
And my hands so red

Better? I think it flows a bit smoother, but I might just be an idiot xD.
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2013  Student Writer
I do like your idea, but I still like mine better, no offense ^^; But thank you for taking time out of your day to give a new suggestion for my poem. (Honestly, I won't ever change this no matter what; it is the way I like it, but seriously, thank you for the insight!)
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:iconmalonepony:
malonepony Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
It's fine for you to love your work :) The poem is beautiful either way. The flow of words is really pretty with a haunting tone, I really like your writing style! The fact that you won't change this means that this must really mean something to you, and that's great with all that goes around us in our daily lives! Thanks for taking the time to read my comment :)
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2013  Student Writer
No no no, thank you for taking your time to devise such wonderful comments! :hug:
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2013  Student Writer
Also, thanks for the fave!
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:icontiffersinger:
Tiffersinger Featured By Owner Mar 14, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
it's pretty good!
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Mar 14, 2013  Student Writer
Awww thank you! :hug:
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:iconnakamie:
Nakamie Featured By Owner Mar 14, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Wow not bad ! I like it ! It really sounds like the character is thinking about what he has done... The time has kind of stopped !
great one
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Mar 14, 2013  Student Writer
I'm pleased that you liked it! :hug:
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:iconvanitysedge:
VanitysEdge Featured By Owner Mar 12, 2013  Student Writer
Interesting twist on a classic :)
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Mar 12, 2013  Student Writer
Thanks! :D
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:iconserenecyrene:
SereneCyrene Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013  Student General Artist
This definitely caught my eye! Well-written! xD
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013  Student Writer
Thank you! :D
Reply
:icondemisven:
DemiSven Featured By Owner Feb 23, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
This is so interesting I love it!!!!
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Feb 23, 2013  Student Writer
Thank you! I'm pleased that you enjoy it!
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:iconbiga-nt:
BigA-nt Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
haha nice work. Very emotive and intersting. Well done. :D
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2013  Student Writer
Thank you!
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:iconxciara-goes-rawrx:
xCiara-Goes-Rawrx Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Really nice. ^^
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2013  Student Writer
Thanks!
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:iconxciara-goes-rawrx:
xCiara-Goes-Rawrx Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2013  Student Digital Artist
Welcome c:
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:iconpedegg:
pedegg Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Wow. That took a surprisingly interesting turn. Nice job!
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2013  Student Writer
Thank you! :hug:
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:iconalice-alamort:
Alice-Alamort Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2013  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
To be honest when I first start reading it I was like "Oh god, not another Roses are Red.. etc poem" but wow, you played it off really well. I love it~! :)
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2013  Student Writer
I know, right? How many of the "Roses Are Red" poems are actually out there? Personally, there are some I like, but most tend to get annoying. An since there were so many people writing these, I decided I'd join the bandwagon and see what I could come up with. Thank you so much for your kind insight!
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:iconenlightenmentlover:
Enlightenmentlover Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
I love how realistic you've made the poem! I like hallmark cheesiness and all, but when it's been played out, I like it creatively raw.

As far as who's responsible... It seems that whenever someone dies, people commonly respond by thinking, "It should have been me that died" or "If only I'd (place whatever action that might or might not make a difference here) " Perhaps in this case, it's metaphorical blood turned into physical blood.
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Writer
So many people are giving me great feedback on this! Is it really that good? I mean, I just wrote this in a few minutes, so I didn't really expect it to get this much attention. ^^; Seriously, thank you people so freaking much! :D
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:iconrouge-fox:
Rouge-Fox Featured By Owner Feb 19, 2013  Student Writer
The beauty of this poem is it's ambiguity, the main character is either a hero or a villain. How we perceive the character lends insight to how we are as people, I want him to have been a hero but then that means he's failed her. She has slipped from his grasp and smashed, and now he's picking up the pieces. That's a terrible position to be in but is it worse knowing you've killed someone? Someone whom you were apparently madly in love with? How could you go on after that?

You think you went too deep into this what about that?
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:iconeevee1999:
Eevee1999 Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Writer
Wow... I never actually thought of it that way! ^^; You're idea seems just so perfect for the poem. Thank you so much for the insight!
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:iconrouge-fox:
Rouge-Fox Featured By Owner Feb 20, 2013  Student Writer
Anytime my friend
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:iconemilyxman67:
EmilyXman67 Featured By Owner Feb 19, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Simple and dark, I like it! :P
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